Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Tuesday May 1, 2018.

Misunderstood Lyrics #101.

Hall & Oates – Maneater / “She’s a magneto”
Bruce Springsteen – Tenth Avenue Freezeout / “Dead Devil in the Freezer”
England Dan & John Ford Coley – “I’d Really Like to See You Tonight” / “I’m not talkin’ ’bout the linen”
AC/DC – “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” / “Dirty jeans and they’re dungarees”
Clash – “Rock the Casbah” / “Lock the cashbox”
Cutting Crew – “(I just) Died in Your Arms Tonight” / “It must have been some kind of cheese”
Steve Miller Band “Jet Airliner” / “Big ol’ Chad at a line-up”
Steve Miller Band “Jet Airliner” / “Big ol’ Jed had a light on”
Elton John “Bennie and the Jets” / “She’s got electric boobs, her ma has too…”
Sandpipers “Guantanamera” / “One Ton Maria”
Starship “Sara” / “Sara, Sara – stomp your boot in my eye”
Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers “Islands in the Stream” / “Ireland’s industry”
B. W. Stevenson “My Maria” / “Di-arrhea”
Various Artists “Winter Wonderland” / “Later on we’ll perspire, as we sit by the fire”
Beach Boys “Fun Fun Fun” / “We’ll have fun fun fun till her daddy takes the tuba away”
AC/DC “You Shook Me All Night Long” / “Oh, sh@*, We all die young.”
Madonna “La Isla Bonita” / “Last night, I spent all my pesos.”
Steve Winwood “Higher Love” / “Bring me an iron lung”
ELO “Strange Magic” / “Got a strange fat chick”
Foreigner “Dirty White Boy” / “I’m just a 30-watt bulb”
Merrilee Rush “Angel in the Morning” / “Just cash my check before you leave me”
Merrilee Rush “Angel in the Morning” / “Just wash my sheets before you leave me”
Bon Jovi “You Give Love A Bad Name” / “You give love a brand name”
ELO “Evil Woman” / “Midevil woman”
Johnny Cash “I Walk The Line” / “I bought the wine”
Alanis Morrissette “You Oughta Know” / “Of the cross-eyed bear that you gave to me”
Huey Lewis & The News “Heart of Rock ‘N Roll” / “The heart of rock ‘n roll is Topeka”
Elton John “Tiny Dancer” / “Hold me close – I’m tryin’ to dance here”
B-52’s “Roam” / “Roam, Nipsey Russell. Roam around the world”
Foreigner “Urgent” / “Virgin”
Belinda Carlisle “I Get Weak” / “I Can’t Wink”
Madness “Our House” / “Outhouse”
Rolling Stones “Beast of Burden” / “My pizza’s burning”
Police “Message in a Bottle” / “A year has passed since I broke my nose”
Abba “Chiquitita” / “Take your teeth out, tell me what’s wrong”
Sandpipers “Guantanamera” / “One Ton Tomato”
Paul McCartney “Band on the Run” / “Stand on the rug”

Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do, don’t

forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

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DAILY QUOTES...

“One of the world’s top Donkey Kong players has been stripped of his records for cheating. He was going to be sentenced to life, but turns out he doesn’t have one.” -Conan O’Brien

“Today Americans celebrated national Take Our Sons and Daughters to Work Day. Tomorrow kids will celebrate New Appreciation for Going to School Day.” -Jimmy Fallon

“After being bitten by a shark last week, a Colorado man achieved a rare distinction of being attacked by a shark, bear, and rattlesnake all within the last four years. Or as it was reported to the man, you’re not allowed back at the zoo.” -Seth Meyers
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G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
My husband and I often spell words so that our small children won’t understand what we’re saying. I didn’t realize what a habit this had become until one day when my husband and I were in the grocery store at the soup aisle. An aggressive young woman banged into our cart, then nudged me over, blocking my access to the soup. Annoyed, I looked at my husband and said, “Boy is she r-u-d-e!” “Yeah,” he replied, “but I’ll bet she can s-p-e-l-l.” 😐

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Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???

 ‘Come on Mitch, unleash the fury, UNLEASH THE FURY!’

ANSWER:

Road Trip! Tom Green was talking to a snake that was about to eat a mouse.

Tuesdays Movie Trivia of the day!

‘I thought we were going to be together forever, and then out of the blue she sends me a John Deer letter.’

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Monday’s Quizzler is……….

Each group of three definitions describes three words that are spelled the same, except for one letter (each group describes a
different set of words). Example: king, ring, wing.

1a) inexperienced
1b) to address with expressions of kind wishes
1c) unreasonable selfish desire

2a) highly skilled
2b) to conform
2c) to accept formally and put into effect

3a) a committee for judging and awarding prizes
3b) conceal or hide
3c) violent anger

4a) a rounded shape
4b) spoken
4c) a gemstone

Begin with the word “SPARKLING” and take away one letter so as to leave a new word. Then take away another
letter from the new word and leave a different word. Continue this, letter by letter, getting a new word every time
until you finally leave one word containing only one letter. You must not disturb the order of the
remaining letters after a removal.

ANSWER:  

The puzzle is solved in this way:

1) SPARKLING.
2) SPARKING.
3) SPARING.
4) SPRING.
5) SPRIG.
6) PRIG.
7) PIG.
8) PI.
9) I.


Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
I saw the happy pair pass by,
Newly wed midst joy and acclamation,
One simple English word thought I,
Exactly summed the situation.
But years have passed and love is slain,
And now they go divergent ways,
For they have been divorced.
Again, one word quite fits the case.
The second word is like the first,
Two central letters just reversed.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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