Monday, December 11, 2017

need-to-see-a-dentist-one-of-my-canines-is-12777151
WELCOME to Monday, December 11, 2017.                               
Funny File Extensions…

.api = Comedian
.asp = Snake-in-the-grass
.bin = Refuse collector
.doc = Fixer
.chk = Chess champion
.dic = Private eye
.exe = Hang man
.fav = Boot licker
.gem = Jeweler
.ico = Office pin-up
.inf = Filing Clerk
.ins = Insurance agent
.mad = Psychiatrist
.mam = Midwife
.mapi = Planning officer
.mov = Removal company
.mpg = Car salesman
.png = Table Tennis Champion
.ppt = Punch and Judy operator
.pub = Alcoholic
.qt = Strong silent type
.rat = Spy
.snd = Disk Jockey
.sys = Sisterfunny file names
.tiff = Marriage guidance counselor
.wav = Cheerleader
.wiz = Magician
.wri = Secretary
.zap = Company hatchet man
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people and 
whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
—————————————————————————————————————————————-
DAILY QUOTES… 

“An Italian winery is releasing five limited-edition bottles of Hello
Kitty-themed wine for the holiday season. It’s the perfect
gift for your alcoholic niece.” -Seth Meyers
“Two hundred cows recently died in a field in Wisconsin. Nobody knows
the cause of death, but they suspect boredom.” -Conan O’Brien
“A brewery in Oregon is coming out with a new Sriracha-flavored beer.
That’s right, beer that tastes like hot sauce. They said it’s the perfect beverage
for finding out if you’re an alcoholic: ‘There’s only one beer left and
it has hot sauce in it – just give it to me!'” -Jimmy Fallon
————————————————————————————————————————————-
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 
A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.”
The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now.”
The child ran back to his father and said, “You lied to me! Mommy said we came from monkeys.”  His father replied, “No, your mother was talking about her side of the family.” 😎

————————————————————————————————————————————-

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  
 ‘I may go back to hating you. It was more fun.’
ANSWER: North by Northwest! Roger Thornhill (Cary Grant) says this to Eve
Kendall (Eva Marie Saint), frustrated by the compiling deceptions.
Mondays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??  

‘We all see what we want to see. Coffey looks and he sees Russians. He sees hate
and fear. You have to look with better eyes than that.’
——————————————————————————————————————————–
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
On me children can practice counting,
while learning about life’s ways.
Goodness will take you up,
but be naughty and you’re going down, down, down.
ANSWER: The game of Chutes and Ladders, a favorite game since 1943. With each
spin you move steadily along, climbing the ladder as a result of good deeds, or sliding
down the chute due to naughtiness. Hounds and Jackals, the ancient game of Egypt,
is also the earliest known example, and possibly the original form, of the ‘Snakes and Ladders’ game.

Monday’s Quizzler is……….
Each of these pairs of words is a rhyme for a familiar phrase. (ex: car and ride = far and wide)
1. Toe and shell
2. Side and coup
3. Graze and greens
4. Frost and ground
5. Hutch and row
6. Fume and chord
7. Splash and harry
8. Dyed and pique
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

 

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