Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

sad-eggs

WELCOME to Friday, April 21, 2017. 

Tech Support Jokes…

Seeing Stars
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars. 😱
Touch and Go
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.😔
Circular argument
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I’m writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?
Local difficulty
Customer: My 14 year-old son has put a password on my computer and I can’t get in.
Advisor: Has he forgotten it?
Customer: No he just won’t tell me it because I’ve grounded him.
Language difficulty
Customer: ‘How do you spell ‘Internet America’ ? Is there a space between ‘inter’ and ‘net’ ?’
Tech Support: ‘No space between ‘inter’ and ‘net’ . It’s spelled normally.’
Customer: ‘Ok. A-M-E-R-I-C-K?’ Tech Support: ‘That’s A-M-E-R-I-C-A.’ Customer: ‘I-C-K???’
Tech Support: ‘A as in apple’ Customer: ‘There’s no ‘K’ in apple!’
No comment
Customer: I met a man on the internet, can you give me his phone number?
Customer: How do I change channel on my monitor?
Advisor: Your monitor won’t have channels like a TV.
Customer: But I was watching the internet channel the other day and now I just get the word processing channel. 😔
Customer: My mouse mat isn’t wired up.
Advisor: I’m not sure I understand, your mouse mat shouldn’t have any wires.
Customer: Well how does it know where my mouse is? Is it wireless?
Customer: ‘My disk ran out of space when trying to save my Word document, so I changed it from double spaced to single spaced and it still wouldn’t fit!’
Advisor: ‘Press any key to continue.
Customer: I can’t find the ‘Any’ key.😱

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

DAILY QUOTES… “There is joy without gratitude” ~ Brene Brown
“At times our own flame goes out, and is rekindled by a spark from another person… Each of us had cause to think, with great gratitude, of those who have lighted the flame within us.” ~ Albert Schweitzer
“Joy is the simplest form of gratitude.” ~ Karl Barth
“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation
is not to utter words but to live by them>” ~ John F. Kennedy
“When you love what you have, you have everything you need.” ~ Unknown😁
“Be thankful for what you have, you’ll end up having more”  Oprah Winfrey
“Nothing os more honored than a grateful heart.” ~ Seneca
“Gratitude and Thanksgiving is more than an attitude, it’s a lifestyle.” ~ Jenni Mullnix
“If the only prayer you ever say is “Thank You”, that would be enough.” ~ Eckhart Tolle


G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. An Englishman, Irishman, Welshman, Scotsman were captured while fighting in a far-off foreign land, and the leader of the captors said, ‘We’re going to line you up in front of a firing squad and shoot you all in turn. But first, you each can make a final wish.’
The Englishman responds, ‘I’d like to hear “God Save The Queen” just one more time to remind me of the auld country, played by the London All Boys Choir. With Morris Dancers Dancing to the tune.’
The Irishman replies, ‘I’d like to hear “Danny Boy” just one more time to remind me of the auld country, sung in the style of Daniel O’Donnell, with Riverdance dancers skipping gaily to the tune.’
The Welshman answers, ‘I’d like to hear “Men Of Harlech” just one more time to remind me of the country, sung as if by the Treorchy Male Voice Choir.’
The Scotsman says quickly, ‘I’d like to be shot first.’😔

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? 

‘Joe, is it O.K. if I leave the couch? ‘Cause I’m gonna leave the couch now, O.K.? My a– is falling asleep, so I gotta go. I’m leaving.’

      

ANSWER: Empire Records! Said by Lucas after Joe banishes him to the couch for taking all the money from Empire Records and gambling
it away in Atlantic City. He takes a couch cushion with him as he gets up. 
Friday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? 
‘I don’t know — maybe you could, like, buy a horse and some diamonds.’
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….  
P is to L.
M is to OK.
Hence, D is to ___
ANSWER: RT, RTS, or RTED.

P is to L forms PISTOL.
M is to OK forms MISTOOK.
The only letters you can add to DISTO to form a word is RT, RTS, or RTED, forming DISTORT, DISTORTS, or DISTORTED.
Friday’s Quizzler is……….  
What does this mean?
ENTURY

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! SUPER QUIZZING BANKS!🙌🙌🙌

  
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s