Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday, January 31, 2017.           

Business 101…………
Persons disagreeing with your facts are always emotional and employ faulty reasoning.
Pessimists have already begun to worry about what is going to replace automation.
Pick good people; talent never wears out.
Pills to be taken in twos always come out of the bottle in threes.
Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
Please do not steal, the IRS hates competition!
Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming.
Problems worthy of attack prove their worth by hitting back.
Producing a system from a specification is like walking on water; it’s easier if it’s frozen.
Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capability of the programmer who must maintain it.
People who complain about the way the ball bounces usually dropped it.
People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either of them being made.
People who think they know everything upset those of us who do.
People will accept your idea much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.
People will believe anything if you whisper it.
People will buy anything that is one-to-a-customer.
People with narrow minds usually have broad tongues.
Perfection is achieved only on the point of collapse.
Performance is directly affected by the perversity of inanimate objects.
Perhaps your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do,

don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!


DAILY QUOTES…  “A man and his 75-year-old mom survived being lifted out of their home during a tornado by sitting together in a bathtub. The man said the tornado didn’t traumatize him but being in a bathtub with his mother did.” -Conan O’Brien

“I’ve been trying to say ‘I love you’ more often, starting this morning. I said it to my family before I left the house. And then to my barista. And then to her manager, when the barista complained that one of the customers was making her uncomfortable.” -Stephen Colbert
“According to a recent study, men on dating sites are more popular if they mention dancing or cooking. Because if there’s one thing women love, it’s a man who can lie.” -Seth Meyers

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 

When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child. It went like this:
“Some parents,” she said, “tell the older child, ‘We love you so much we decided to bring another child into this family.’ But think about that. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, ‘Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife.'”
One of the women spoke up immediately. “Does she cook?”

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? ‘Brains stick with brains. A bomb could go off and their mutant genes would form the same cliques!’  

ANSWER:  ‘Say Anything…’ Spoken by Corey Flood (Lili Taylor) to Lloyd Dobbler (John Cusack). 
Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???  ‘When I buy a new book, I read the last page first. That way, in case I die before I finish, I’ll know how it ends. That, my friend, is a dark side.’ 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

What is represented below?
S V
K E
I S
P S
P E
E L
R

ANSWER: The captain goes down with the ship.

Skipper is another word for captain.
Vessel is another word for ship.
These two words both go down.

  

Tuesday’s Quizzler is………. 

What two names of US capital cities rhyme but share no vowels?
       

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ 

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.comwww.stlzoo.org

 

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