Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Monday, December 19, 2016. 

THE SYMPTOMS OF INNER PEACE…
Be on the lookout for symptoms of inner peace. The hearts of a great many have already been expose to inner peace and it is possible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions. This could pose a serious threat to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict in the world.
Some signs and symptoms of inner peace:
* A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on past experiences.
* An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.
* A loss of interest in judging other people.
* A loss of interest in judging self.
* A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.
* A loss of interest in conflict.
* A loss of the ability to worry. (This is a very serious symptom.)
* Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation.
* Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.
* Frequent attacks of smiling.
* An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.
* An increased susceptibility to the love extended by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.
WARNING: If you have some or all of the above symptoms, please be advised that your condition of inner peace may be so far advanced as to not be curable. If you are exposed to anyone exhibiting any of these symptoms, remain exposed only at your own risk.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!


DAILY QUOTES…

“When an FBI agent first contacted the DNC to tell them they’d been hacked, the person who took the call thought it was a prank. ‘Yeah, it happens more than you’d think,’ said FBI Agent Seymour Butts.” -Jimmy Fallon
“The oldest living American, a New Jersey woman, has just turned 114. At her birthday party she said, ‘Why are we celebrating? I just spent 114 years in New Jersey.'” -Conan O’Brien
“Google released their list of the most-searched phrases of 2016. The top-trending search terms were Powerball, Prince, Hurricane Matthew, and Pokemon Go. I think that sums up our priorities as Americans: money, celebrities, the weather, and playing games on our phones.” -Jimmy Kimmel  

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 

A co-worker was telling us about her sister who was coming to visit her for the holidays. Someone asked how old her sister was, at which she paused, thought for a bit, and then answered, “She’s half as old as I am, that’s how I always remember.”
So someone else (okay, it was me) said, “That’s neat, So every year that you age, she only ages half a year?”
My co-worker thought about that, and then said, “Oh, yeah, I guess it only works on even years.”

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? 

“Do you have some valid reasons for wanting a divorce?”

 

ANSWER: The War of the Roses! Again, Danny DeVito (Gavin D’Amato), who is also

the director of “War of the Roses”, introduces the movie.

Monday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? 

“When you love someone, you´ve gotta trust them.”
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
What does the following rebus represent?
“Hurry, let me in,” said the Jester.
“No, me first!” said the Joker.
“Perhaps we should be careful about walking there,” said Gabriel.
“A wiser course may be to avoid stepping on the area,” said Uziel.

ANSWER: Fools rush in where angels fear to tread. The joker and jester are other words for the court “fool”, and Gabriel and Uziel are two well known angels.

 

Friday’s Quizzler is………. 

A spoonerism is a pair of words that can have their initial sounds switched to form new words. The pairs need only sound the same, not necessarily be spelled the same (power saw & sour paw, horse cart & coarse heart). There may sometimes be one or two connecting words (kick the stone & stick the cone, king of the rats & ring of the cats). Given the following definitions, what are the spoonerisms?
1) bed item and grape beverage & a tree and a tree
2) stony headwear & rodent puck handler
3) locomotive accident & a wading bird’s garbage
4) a prim and proper man from Stockholm & a sugary necessity

                         
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ 

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.comwww.stlzoo.org

 

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