Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday, October 4, 2016.       

Funny Names………….

Carrie Oakey – karaoke

Terry Bill  

Barb Dwyer – barbed wire

Stan Still – stand still as in an Army Sergeant-Major: ‘Stand still you ‘orrible little man.’

Annette Kirton – a net curtain

Theresa Green or Brown

Justin Case

Norman Knight  

Rick O’Shea – as in “ricochet” of a bullet

Seymour Legg – see more leg……………….

Simon Swindells

Doug Hole

Rose Bush

Daisy Picking

Pearl Button

Penny Bunn

Dawn Hobbs

Anna Prentice

Anna Sasin

Ray Gunn came very close to inclusion in this top ten – just Jo King.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!    

 

DAILY QUOTES….   

“A new study suggests that ancient cave art from 40,000 years ago was mostly done by women. So even back then men didn’t have a say in decorating.” -Jimmy Fallon

“A new study reveals that the average fast-food chicken nugget is almost 60 percent fat. The study also says that the average fast-food customer is almost 60 percent chicken nuggets.” -Conan O’Brien

“According to a new report, there is a shrine in Japan solely dedicated to hemorrhoids. Seating is limited, but usually available.” -Seth Meyers  

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

As a new school Principal, Mr. Mitchell was checking over his school on the first day. Passing the stockroom, he was startled to see the door wide open and teachers bustling in and out, carrying off books and supplies in preparation for the arrival of students the next day.

The school where he had been a Principal the previous year had used a check-out system only slightly less elaborate than that at Fort Knox.

Cautiously, he asked the school’s long time Custodian, “Do you think it’s wise to keep the stock room unlocked and to let the teachers take things without requisitions?”

The Custodian looked at him gravely. “We trust them with the children, don’t we?”Emoji 

 

 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “So, Pee Wee plays the little fairy, and you play the big fairy. That’s a lot of fairies.”  

ANSWER: Porky’s II: The Next Day! Tommy (Wyatt Knight) said this to Billy (Mark Herrier) when he found out Billy was playing Oberon, the “forest ranger”, in a Shakespeare play. The “Porky’s” trilogy are some of the funniest movies ever made. 

Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???  “He had yellow eyes. So, help me God, yellow eyes.”

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

Do not begrudge this,
For it is the fate that men want.
Yet it is feared,
And shunned in many lands.
Causes problems, and sometimes gaps,
Can hobble the strongest, and make memory lapse.
What is this danger we all face
For being a part of the human race? 

ANSWER: Old Age.  

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….

See if you can figure out three words that are homophones of each other in each of the five problems below.
 
1. Worthless – flat piece moving with the air – blood vessel
2. Path or direction – to measure weight – watery part of milk 
3. Having no money – careful study; microscopic hole – to flow freely
4. Warty frog – having toes – pulled ahead
5. A cry – welt; corduroy ridge – large oceanic mammal
 
 
 
 
 
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/      

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.comwww.stlzoo.org 

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