Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday, September 27, 2016.   

Hymns for the Over 60s……

Precious Lord, Take My Hand, And Help Me Up

Just a Slower Walk with Thee

Go Tell It on the Mountain, But Speak Up

Nobody Knows the Trouble I Have Seeing

Guide Me O Thou Great Lord God, I’ve Forgotten Where I’ve Left my Car

Count Your Many Birthdays, Count Them One By One

Blessed Insurance

It Is Well With My Soul, But My Knees Hurt

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!    

 

DAILY QUOTES….   

“A new study finds that if you’re drunk around sober people, you’ll think you’re less drunk than if you’re around other drunk people. And if you’re drunk around sober people, chances are you’ve got a problem.” -Jimmy Fallon

“A man is getting bar mitzvah’d at age 113. They’re hoping the attendance is better than last year when he got circumcised.” -Conan O’Brien

“This week a study was released by the World Health Organization showing that the United States is the third most depressing country in the world after India and China. When Americans heard the news they were like, ‘Oh, we only got third?'” -James Corden 

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

 An elderly gentleman checked into a New York hotel. The clerk mentioned the phone service the establishment made available for calling guests who wished to rise at an early hour. 

“No need for that, young man,” snapped the old timer. “I always wake up at five A.M. sharp – without an alarm clock.”

“Very good, sir,” the clerk replied, then asked, “Would you mind calling me at six?”Emoji  

 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “…Because they knew that this England place was bogus, and if we didn’t get ourselves some cool rules, pronto, we’d just be bogus, too.”   

ANSWER:  Fast Times at Ridgemont High! Jeff Spiccoli (Sean Penn) said this when Mr. Hand (Ray Walston) trapped him in his room and forced him to make up the time he wasted in History class.

Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???  “Beef jerky time!”

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

 What common phrase does this rebus represent?
 
SKIN B-U-T SKIN SKIN SKIN
FLESH FLESH FLESH FLESH
MUSCLE MUSCLE MUSCLE
BONE BONE BONE BONE

ANSWER:  Beauty is only skin deep. When spoken quickly the letters B-U-T sound like the word “beauty,” and “B-U-T” is only as deep as the word “SKIN” is. 

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….

Sam loves to communicate by using rebus puzzles. This is sometimes confusing for other residents of the university dormitory. One night, this sign was posted on Sam’s door:
 
NIOILTE
FIRE
 
The other residents have no idea what Sam is up to. Do you?
 
 
 
 
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/      

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.comwww.stlzoo.org 

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