Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Thursday, June 30, 2016.  

Here’s the story…. 

A professor stood before his class of twenty senior organic biology students, about to hand out the final exam.

“I want to say that it’s been a pleasure teaching you this semester. I know you’ve all worked extremely hard and many of you are off to medical school after summer. So that no one gets their GPA messed up because they might have been celebrating a bit too much this week, anyone who would like to opt out of the final exam today will receive a ‘B’ for the test.”

There was much rejoicing in the class as students got up, walked to the front of the class, and took the professor up on his offer. As the last taker left the room, the professor looked out over the handful of remaining students and asked, “Anyone else? This is your last chance.”

One final student rose up and opted out of the final.

The professor closed the door and took attendance of those students remaining. “I’m glad to see you believe in yourselves,” he said. “You all get ‘A’s.”

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!    

 

DAILY QUOTES….   

“The UK officially voted to leave the European Union. It caused the British pound to hit a 31-year low. You could tell Brits were struggling. Today Queen Elizabeth was wearing one of those cardboard crowns from Burger King.” -Jimmy Fallon

“In Jerusalem, renovation work is beginning on Jesus’s burial tomb. It’s being listed as ‘occupied by previous owner for only three days!'” -Conan O’Brien

“A man in Minneapolis, Minnesota, is suing the TSA claiming that overly long airport security lines caused him to miss a flight. Seems like a strange move until you realize there’s no jury in the world that will side with the TSA.” -James Corden

 

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

The new Supermarket near our house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. 

When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the scent of fresh hay. 

When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. 

The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn. 

I don’t buy toilet paper there any more. Emoji

 

 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “My little brother paid a buck to see your underwear.” 

ANSWER: Sixteen Candles! Samantha (Molly Ringwald) is mortified to hear this from her best friend Randy. Another favorite quote of mine in the film that leads up to this is when Sam says “I can’t believe I gave my panties to a geek”. 

Thursday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “All I need is a watermelon and two jelly doughnuts.”

 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….

The bottom heats,

The top cools,

And little blobs

Swim in my pools

I can be different colours,

And be a source of light,

A bedroom accessory,

I light up the night!

What am I?  

ANSWER: A lava lamp. The hint referred to the fact that a volcano has lava in it.  

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

Six words that contain YO as a letter-pair have had all of their other letters removed and placed into a pool. Put those letters back in their proper places. What are the words?

YO—, YO—-, -YO—, –YO–, —YO-, —-YO

Pool: A, B, B, C, C, D, D, D, E, E, E, E, I, L, M, M, N, N, N, N, P, R, R

 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! NICE WORK BANKS! 

EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji                                  

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/   

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.com.

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