Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday, May 31, 2016.  

Tombstone….

Headstone of Russell J. Larsen in the Logan City Cemetery, Logan, Utah. I wonder if he died knowing he won the ‘Coolest Headstone’ contest! His headstone reads:

Five Rules For Men To Follow For A Happy Life:

  1. It’s important to have a woman who helps at home, cooks from time to time, cleans up, and has a job.
  2. It’s important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
  3. It’s important to have a woman who you can trust, and doesn’t lie to you.
  4. It’s important to have a woman who is good in bed, and likes to be with you.
  5. It’s very, very important that these four women do not know each other or you could end up dead like me.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!     

 

DAILY QUOTES….    

“It is Fleet Week here in New York City. Over 4,000 service members come to New York City during Fleet Week. So if you see a lot of people happy to be off a giant ship, they’re either sailors or they just got off a Carnival Cruise.” -Jimmy Fallon 

“Several former contestants from the show ‘The Biggest Loser’ are suing the show for abuse. The contestants said, ‘We were completely unprepared for being mistreated when we signed up to be on a show called ‘The Biggest Loser.'” -Conan O’Brien

“The electronics company LG identified a new phenomenon called low-battery anxiety. People become nervous, distracted, and frustrated when their phones are about to die. If you are not familiar with low-battery anxiety, it’s a real condition that primarily affects people with no actual problems.” -James Corden  

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F…. 

 I have my changed my system for labeling homemade freezer meals. I used to carefully note in large clear letters, “Meatloaf” or “Pot Roast” or “Steak and Vegetables or “Chicken and Dumplings” or “Beef Pot Pie.”

However, I used to get frustrated when I asked my husband what he wanted for dinner because he never asked for any of those things. So, I decided to stock the freezer with what he really likes.

If you look in my freezer now you’ll see a whole new set of labels. You’ll find dinners with neat little tags that say: “Whatever,” “Anything,” “I Don’t Know,” “I Don’t Care,” “Something Good,” or “Food.” My frustration is now reduced because no matter what my husband replies when I ask him what he wants for dinner, I know that it is there waiting. Emoji 

 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “You said you couldn’t believe in anyone who didn’t believe in you. I believed in you. I just didn’t believe in me.” 

Answer:  Pretty in Pink! This was said by Blane to Andy at the end of the movie. This popular teen flick from 1986 also starred Molly Ringwald and Jonathon Cryer. 

 

Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “I have your car towed all the way to your house and all you’ve got for me is light beer.”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….

In this teaser, your job is to discover the missing word that links the two given words. The dashes indicate the number of letters in the missing word. Good luck!

i.e. WAR – FARE – WELL

1. ARM _ _ _ _ _ LIFT

2. CREAM _ _ _ _ ADDER

3. WOOD _ _ _ _ BENCH

4. SHOULDER _ _ _ _ _ POCKET

5. CANDY _ _ _ _ WASHER  

ANSWER: 1. ARM (CHAIR) LIFT

2. CREAM (PUFF) ADDER

3. WOOD (WORK) BENCH

4. SHOULDER (PATCH) POCKET

5. CANDY (DISH) WASHER 

 

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….

Five words that contain MB as a letter-pair have had all of their other letters removed and placed into a pool. Put those letters back in their proper places. What are the words?

-MB–, –MB-, —MB, —MB–, —MB—

Pool: C, D, E, E, E, I, I, J, L, L, N, O, O, O, R, R, S, T, U, U

 

 

 

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/  Emoji EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.com.

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