Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Friday, December 18, 2015.   

Inspirational Thoughts for the Day……….

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. – 

The journey to happiness involves finding the courage to go down into ourselves and take responsibility for what’s there: all of it.  

By learning you will teach; by teaching you will understand.  

Age considers; youth ventures.  

One moment of patience may ward off great disaster.  One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.  

Peace: It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.  

History is a gallery of pictures in which there are few originals and many copies.  

It is one of life’s laws that as soon as one door closes another opens. But the tragedy is we look at the closed door and disregard the open one.  

Success is not the key to happiness.  Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.  

Kind words are short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.  

The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.  

I had the blues because I had no shoes until upon the street, I met a man who had no feet.  

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!     

 

DAILY QUOTES….    

Men who seek happiness are like drunkards who can never find their house but are sure that they have one. – Voltaire

The brain is a wonderful organ.  It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. – Robert Frost

At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since. – Salvador Dali

How can anyone govern a nation that has two hundred and forty-six different kinds of cheese? – Charles De Gaulle

One camel does not make fun of another camel’s hump. Ghanaian Proverb

It’s easy to identify people who can’t count to ten. They’re in front of you 

in the supermarket express lane. – June Henderson

Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep. – Carl Sandburg 

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

Mark had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work.  After a few weeks of this, Mr Johnson, his boss, called him in and threatened to fire him if he didn’t do something about it.

So Mark went to his doctor, who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. He got a great night’s sleep and actually beat the alarm in the morning. After a leisurely breakfast, he cheerfully drove to work.

“Mr Johnson,” he said, “The pill my doctor subscribed me actually worked!”

“That’s all fine,” said his boss, “But where were you yesterday?”Emoji

 

 

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? ‘Oh, and that’s based on what, your professional attraction to her?’ 

Answer: Big Momma’s House! John said this to Malcolm when Malcolm slept with Sherry as Big Momma. 

Friday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ‘Old McWalter had a farm, E-I-E-I-O!’

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

What do these sentences translate to?

“A research team proceeded towards the apex of a natural geologic protuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement of a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was unspecified. One member of the team precipitously descended, sustaining severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomical structure; subsequently the second member of the team performed a self rotational translation oriented in the same direction taken by the first team member.”  

ANSWER:  Jack and Jill went up the hill

to fetch a pail of water

Jack fell down and broke his crown

and Jill came tumbling after 

 

Friday’s Quizzler is……….

I am where the sky is orange;

I am where the grass is red;

I am the land of violet bananas

and the home to blue oranges.

What am I?

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/  

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.com.

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