WELCOME to Thursday, November 12, 2015.
TechnolO’Gee for Country Folk….
LOG ON: Making a wood stove hotter
LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood
MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the woodstove
DOWNLOAD: Gettin the farwood off the truck
MEGA HERTZ: When yer not keerful gettin the farwood
FLOPPY DISC: Whatcha git from tryin to carry too much farwood
RAM: That thar thing whut splits the farwood
HARD DRIVE: Gettin home in the winter time
PROMPT: Whut the mail ain’t in the winter time
WINDOWS: Whut to shut when it’s cold outside
SCREEN: Whut to shut when it’s blak fly season
BYTE: Whut dem dang flys do
CHIP: Munchies fer the TV
MICRO CHIP: Whut’s in the bottom of the munchie bag
MODEM: Whacha did to the hay fields
DOT MATRIX: Old Dan Matrix’s wife
LAP TOP: Whar the kitty sleeps
KEYBOARD: Whar ya hang the dang truck keys
SOFTWARE: Them dang plastic forks and knifs
MOUSE: What eats the grain in the barn
MOUSE PAD: That’s hippie talk fer the mouse hole
MAIN FRAME: Holds up the barn ruf
PORT: Fancy Flatlander wine
ENTER: Northerner talk fer, C’Mon in y’all
RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: When ya cain’t ‘member whut ya paid fer the rifle
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday and whatever you do,
don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
“For the first time ever, more than half of all senior citizens in the U.S. are using the Internet. Yeah, I read that when my grandma sent the entire story to me in the subject line of an email.” -Jimmy Fallon
“A teenager in Arkansas was arrested after he was caught driving without a license on his way to the DMV to take a driving test, tried to flee, and crashed into a police car. On the plus side, it sounds like he was probably going to fail anyway.” -Seth Meyers
“Today two men dressed as Batman and Captain America tried to rob someone at a gas station. They’re being charged with attempted robbery and mixing Marvel with DC.” -Conan O’Brien
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become collectors’ items. I went to the bank and picked up a hundred, serially numbered and still in their original band. On my next trip to my parents’ house, I gave the $200 to my mother and said, “Take good care of these. They might be worth something someday.”
Several months later I asked Mom if she was keeping the two dollar bills safe. “Oh, yes!” she replied. “I deposited them in the bank the day after you left.”
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? ‘Put me back in! Put me back in!’
Answer: Look Who’s Talking! The first of this somewhat popular trilogy.
Thursday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ‘Twenty dwarves took turns doing handstands on the carpet.’
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
What is special about these four words?
what, hole, ales, test
ANSWER: If you take each corresponding letter from each word, the same words are formed again:
What Hole Ales Test
wHat hOle aLes tEst
whAt hoLe alEs teSt
whaT holE aleS tesT
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
Decipher this phrase-
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/