Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday, October 13, 2015.   

10 Steps to Being Handy Around the House…….

1. If you can’t find a screwdriver, use a knife. If you break off the tip, it’s an improved screwdriver.

2. Try to work alone. An audience is rarely any help.

3. Despite what you may have been told by your mother, praying and cursing are both helpful in home repair… but only if you are working alone.

4. Work in the kitchen whenever you can… many fine tools are there, its warm and dry, and you are close to the refrigerator.

5. If it’s electronic, get a new one.

6. Keep it simple: Get a new battery; replace the bulb or fuse; see if the tank is empty; try turning it to the “on” switch; or just paint over it.

7. Always take credit for miracles. If you dropped the alarm clock while taking it apart and it suddenly starts working, you have fixed it.

8. Regardless of what people say, kicking, pounding, and throwing sometimes DOES help.

9. If something looks level, it is level.

10. Above all, if what you’ve done is stupid, but it works, then it isn’t stupid.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday and whatever you do, 

don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!   

 

 

DAILY QUOTES….     

“Today, NASA announced that it has finally discovered water on Mars. When they heard, Americans were like, ‘Eh, tell us when they discover beer.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Executives from Hasbro have announced that the Transformers movie franchise will get four more films in the next decade–unless their demands are met.” -Seth Meyers 

“Some scientists now believe that Jesus Christ had a wife. They also believe that Jesus’ nephew called Jesus’ wife the “Auntie Christ.'” -Conan O’Brien

 

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

I realized that my five-year-old grandson had been watching too many reality TV shows the day we attended a relative’s wedding. 

As the four bridesmaids walked down the aisle toward the front of the church, he turned to me and asked, “Is this where the groom decides which one he wants to marry?” 

 

 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  ‘Yeah, well at least I’m not ugly!’

Answer:  American Beauty! Said by Mena Suvari to Thora Birch.

Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ‘Am I really a grouch?’

 

 

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

What is represented here?

Spring – Hola

Summer – Bonjour

Fall – Hello

Winter – Aloha

ANSWER: Season’s Greetings.   

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….

Here is a group of common three-letter words. Can you take these and turn them into half as many 6 letter words? Each three-letter word is used only once. 

bar, bit, box, boy, car, day, den, dim, fly, hid, low, now, nut, pan, pea, sun, ten, try, win, wit

 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! NICE WORK BANKS! 

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LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ 

 

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.com.

  
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