Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

WELCOME to Wednesday, October 7, 2015.   

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More Ponderings……………. 

If cats and dogs didn’t have fur would we still pet them?
If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what are Girl Scout cookies made out of?
If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?
If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look the way they do?
If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of?
If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?
Why do the signs that say “Slow Children” have a picture of a running child?
Why do they call it “chili” if it’s hot?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?
How can there be self-help “groups”?
How do you get off a non-stop flight?
How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
How many weeks are there in a light year?
If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman?
If athletes get athlete’s foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?
If Barbie’s so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?
If blind people wear dark glasses, why don’t deaf people wear earmuffs?

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!   

 

DAILY QUOTES….     

Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. Helen Keller  

What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals. Zig Ziglar 

By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail. – Benjamin Franklin   

Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. Lao Tzu 

Things do not happen. Things are made to happen. – John F. Kennedy 

A goal is a dream with a deadline. – Napoleon Hill 

Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds. – Gordon B. Hinckley   

Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible. Tony Robbins

 

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

A missionary recruit goes to Venezuela for the first time, struggling with the language. He visits one of the local churches and sits in the front row.

So as not to make a fool of himself, he decides to pick someone out of the crowd to imitate. He decides to follow the man sitting next to him in the front pew. As they sing, the man claps his hands, so the missionary recruit claps, too. When the man stands up to pray, the missionary recruit stands up, too. When the man sits down, the missionary sits down.

Later in the service, the man next to him stands up again, so the missionary stands up, too.

Suddenly a hush falls over the entire congregation. A few people gasp. The missionary looks around and sees that no one else is standing. So he sits down.

After the service ends, the missionary recruit greets the preacher. “I take it you don’t speak Spanish,” the preacher says.

The missionary replies, “No, I don’t. It’s that obvious?”

“Well yes,” the preacher says. “I announced that the Acosta family had a new-born baby boy, and I asked the proud father to please stand up.”   

 

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? They can’t evict you at Christmas. You’ll be ho-ho-homeless.’ 

Answer: Go! Spoken by the ginger guy that was in ‘Grange Hill,’ Desmond Askew.  

Wednesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???  ‘Why don’t you all just fade away.’ 

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….

 Can you find 13 animals hidden in these words?

Pheasantoadderaturtleechareelionewtiger 

ANSWER:  Pheasant, ant, toad, adder, rat, turtle, leech, char, hare, eel, lion, newt, tiger.  

 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….

Use the missing words or word fragments in the film titles below to make a festive phrase.

The ____maker

___ Golden Pond

Battlefield _____

Thelma ___ Louise

_____ _____ Hunting

The Road ___ Perdition

The Sum of ____ Fears

_____ in Black

 

 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! GREAT WORK BANKS! 

 EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji 

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ 

 

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.orgwww.GodLovesPraise.com.

 

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