Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Monday, October 5, 2015.   

Good Writing Advice……

In promulgating your esoteric cogitations or articulating your superficial sentimentalities and amicable philosophical or psychological observations, beware of platitudinous ponderosity.
Let your conversational communications possess a compacted conciseness, a clarified comprehensibility, a coalescent cogency and a concatenated consistency.
Eschew obfuscation and all conglomeration of flatulent garrulity, jejune babblement and asinine affectations.
Let your extemporaneous descants and unpremeditated expatiations have intelligibility and voracious vivacity without rodomontade or thrasonical bombast.
Sedulously avoid all polysyllabic profundity, pompous prolificacy and vain vapid verbosity.
If you are really interested to know, the above means: “Be brief and don’t use big words.”

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday and whatever you do, 

don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!   

 

DAILY QUOTES….     

“Whole Foods announced that it is cutting 1,500 jobs. Although Whole Foods doesn’t want to call them ‘unemployed.’ They’re calling them ‘free range employees.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“Friday was National Coffee Day. For those who don’t know, coffee is an ingredient in the milkshakes they serve at Starbucks.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“A new study released today shows that blotting pizza with a napkin to remove extra grease can remove an average of 40 calories per slice. So if you’re looking for an easy way to lose weight, just eat that napkin.” -Seth Meyers

 

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

At a workshop on dog temperament, the instructor noted that a test for a canine’s disposition was for an owner to fall down and act hurt. A dog with poor temperament would try to bite the person, whereas a good dog would lick his owner’s face or show concern. 

Once, while eating pizza in the living room, I decided to try out this theory on my two dogs. I stood up, clutched my heart, let out a scream and collapsed on the floor. 

The dogs looked at me, glanced at each other and raced to the coffee table for my pizza.   

 

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  ‘I just love to watch him go.’

Answer: Thelma and Louise! Academy Award winner Geena Davis said this about a rather tasty Brad Pitt.   

Monday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ‘You could choke a dozen donkeys on that.’ 

 

 

Friday’s Quizzler is……….

For each of the pairs of words below, insert a word in the blank space between them to form two separate words such that the inserted word finishes the first word and begins the second. For example, given “MAN ____ ON”, you would insert the word “GO” to form “MANGO” and “GOON”. The hint gives the number of letters in each of the words that must be inserted. 

BOW ____ AGE

GENE ____ KING

LAND ____ GOAT

DIG ____ SELF

PAR ____ ATE  

ANSWER: LINE (bowline, lineage)  

TIC (genetic, ticking)

SCAPE (landscape, scapegoat)

IT (digit, itself)

ROT (parrot, rotate) or DON (pardon, donate) 

 

 

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

Mac’s new house number has three digits. When she challenged her friends to guess it, they tried: 135, 780, 785, and 732.  “That’s amazing,” Mac said. “You’ve each guessed exactly one digit correctly and in its right place!” What is Mac’s house number? 

 

 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO OUR RESIDENT GENIUS, MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! NICE SOLVING WORK BANKS! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji EmojiEmoji

Emoji

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ 

 

LINKS: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.org. www.GodLovesPraise.com.

 

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