WELCOME to Wednesday, June 24, 2015.
1) Lawyers wear law suits.
2) Next time you get a lawyer a drink, give him just-ice.
3) A lawyer using a facsimile machine must be sure to get his fax straight.
4) A lawyer for a church did some cross-examining.
5) Does a lawyer representing an angry cow find just cause for sour milk in a dairy case?
6) A detective likes to have a brief case.
7) The detective who went to investigate a burned down post office figured that it must be blackmail.
8) There are many judges who would like to acquit smoking.
9) Old judges never die, they just slur their sentences.
10) A police dog is often the scenter of a drug arrest.
11) If there’s one person you don’t want to interrupt in the middle of a sentence, it’s a judge.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
“Humor is also a way of saying something serious.” –T. S. Eliot
“Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.” –Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Obviously crime pays, or there’d be no crime.” –G. Gordon Liddy
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur, two to research precedents, one to dictate a letter, one to stipulate, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “Are we having a Boo Radley moment?”
Answer: Benny and Joon! Joon is mentally ill and doesn’t like being treated like a freak. This quote is a reference to a character from “To Kill a Mockingbird”.
Wednesday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Remember my birthday party? You drank all the Blueberry Schnapps and luged on my mom?”
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
When you behead a word, you remove the first letter and still have a valid word. You will be given clues for the two words, longer word first.
Example: Begin -> Sour, acidic
Answer: The words are Start and Tart.
1. Wear away -> Travelled on an animal
2. Fill with joy -> Not on time; dead
3. Each; all -> To a high degree
4. Something that happens -> To let off pressure
5. Large property with a house -> Declare; say
6. Come out from -> To combine; unite
7. Feeling; passion -> Movement
8. Same in ability; fairness -> Trait; character
ANSWER: 1. Erode -> Rode 2. Elate -> Late 3. Every -> Very 4. Event -> Vent 5. Estate -> State
6. Emerge -> Merge 7. Emotion -> Motion 8. Equality -> Quality
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
What phrase is represented below?
HEA wooden stick VEN
HEA wooden stick + sulphur head VEN
HEA wooden stick + sulphur head + phosphorus tip VEN
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO OUR RESIDENT GENIUS MS. ANDREA L. BANKS FOR SOLVING TUESDAY’S QUIZZLER OF THE DAY!
Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/