Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

10302162_787100841331671_9059869415882242172_n

WELCOME to Tuesday, October 28, 2014. 

Hilarious, and True Funny Crime Stories….

Bungling Burglar - Ski mask story

  1. A man went into a drug store in Baltimore, pulled a gun, announced a robbery, and pulled a “Hefty-bag” face mask over his head. He then and realized that he’d forgotten to cut eye holes in the mask. He was arrested by security.

  2. A Belgium news agency reported, last year, that a man suspected of robbing a jewelry store in Liege said he couldn’t have done it because he was busy breaking into a school at the same time.

    Police then arrested him for breaking into the school.

  3. Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off their truck. Scared, they left the scene and drove home
    ………… With the chain still attached to the machine
    ………… With their bumper still attached to the chain.
    ………… With their vehicle’s license plate still attached to the bumper. You couldn’t make it up!

  4. When a man attempted to siphon gas from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for.  Police arrived at the scene to find an ill man curled up next to a motor home trying to steal gasoline and plugged his hose into the motor home’s sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he’d ever had.

  5. Investigating a purse snatching, detectives picked up a man who fit the thief’s description and drove him back to the scene. He was told to exit the car and face the victim for an ID.

    The suspect carefully eyed the victim, and shouted, ‘Yeah, that’s the woman I robbed.’

  

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people and and 

whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!  Peace I am outta here, Eucman!  

 

QUOTES OF THE DAY   

You cannot create experience. You must undergo it. Albert Camus

Do not wait for the day of judgement, it takes place every day, Albert Camus

All men desire knowledge. Aristotle

Education is the best provision for old age. Aristotle

Well begun is half done. Aristotle

For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them. Aristotle 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, ‘I have a complaint!’

‘Yes, Ma’am?’ said the librarian looking up at her. 

‘I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible.’

Puzzled by her complaint the librarian asked, ‘What was wrong with it?’ 

‘It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever,’ said the blonde.

The librarian nodded and said, ‘Ahhh. So you must be the person who took our ‘phone book.’ 

Monday Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 

What movie is this quote from??? “Well, guess what? We’re changing the rules a little bit, okay? We’re going to open the presents now, not later, now. Why? Because we’re adults and we can open the presents . . . whenever we want!”   

 

Answer: The Ref! “The Ref” stars Kevin Spacey and Judy Davis as a very dysfunctional couple on the verge of divorce. They are being held hostage on Christmas Eve by Denis Leary’s character Gus. This line is said by Gus as the family is sitting around arguing about when to open the Christmas presents. 

 

Tuesday Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 

quote from??? “No! You just cost someone their life! Game over!”

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

Given the word STANDARD, take away two letters and add three digits to make a logical sequence. 

 

Answer: Take away the A’s to leave ST ND RD. Then add 1, 2, and 3: 1ST 2ND 3RD.  

Tuesday’s  Quizzler is……….

A monk has a very specific ritual for climbing up the steps to the temple. First he climbs up to the middle step and meditates for 1 minute. Then he climbs up 8 steps and faces east until he hears a bird singing. Then he walks down 12 steps and picks up a pebble. He takes one step up and tosses the pebble over his left shoulder. Now, he walks up the remaining steps three at a time which only takes him 9 paces. How many steps are there?

 

 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.  https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: www.slampi.org., www.hopeBUILD.org. Emoji

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s