Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Monday, August 11, 2014.      

Fascinating But Irrelevant Facts……
Every person has a unique tongue print.
Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn’t wear pants.*
In 1980, a Las Vegas hospital suspended workers for betting on when patients would die.
Thomas Edison was afraid of the dark.
‘Kemo Sabe’ means ‘soggy shrub’ in Navajo.
In Kentucky, 50% of the people who get married for the first time are teenagers.
Kotex was first manufactured as bandages, during WWI.
Einstein couldn’t speak fluently when he was nine. His parents thought he might be retarded.
In Los Angeles, there are fewer people than there are automobiles.
About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they’re still sitting on it.
You’re more likely to get stung by a bee on a windy day that in any other weather.
An average person laughs about 5 times a day.
Research indicates that mosquitoes are attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas.
Penguins can jump as high as 6 feet in the air.
The average person is about a quarter of an inch taller at night.
A sneeze zooms out of your mouth at over 600 mph.
The three best-known western names in China: Jesus Christ, Richard Nixon, and Elvis Presley.
The Neanderthal’s brain was bigger than yours is.Will and Guy’s Humour – irrelevant facts
A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if her husband doesn’t give her coffee.
The average bank teller loses about $250 every year.
In 1980, there was only one country in the world with no telephones – Bhutan.
Your right lung takes in more air than your left one does.
Women’s hearts beat faster than men’s.
Pollsters say that 40% of dog and cat owners carry pictures of the pets in their wallets.
Bubble gum contains rubber.
You can only smell 1/20th as well as a dog.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“According to a new study, one in four Americans admits to not exercising at all. As a result, one in four Americans is actually TWO in four Americans.” -Seth Meyers
 
“Home Depot is now selling 3D printers, which customers can use to print out tools and parts. It’s all part of Home Depot’s plan to immediately go out of business.” -Jimmy Fallon
 
“It’s a great day for Pope Francis. He released his top 10 tips for feeling happier. Most of the Pope’s tips were what I expected, like No. 7, ‘Respect nature.’ No. 3, ‘Be calm.’ Except No. 1 – start every day by watching the video of Justin Bieber getting punched in face.” -Craig Ferguson 
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

My husband retired, and for the first time in over 40 years I had to think about preparing midday meals. Tired of it after several months, I said, “I married you for better or worse, but not for lunch.”  “Fair enough. From now on I’ll make my own,” he replied.  A few weeks later he had to go downtown on business and invited me to join him afterwards.  “We could have lunch at that Chinese place we both like,” he suggested.  I happily agreed. At the restaurant the next day we were seated, and the waiter came to take our order.

My husband looked up and with a straight face said, “Separate checks, please.”

 

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 

What movie is this quote from???  ‘You came back from the desert with a new friend, didn’t you, Benny?’
 
Answer: The Mummy! Benny: ‘It is better to be the right hand of the Devil than in his path. As long as I serve him, I am immune.’  
 
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 
quote from??? ‘Hello, Clarice.’
 
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
Can you figure out what words are represented by the following?
 
1. Iron + M + Iodine + Nickel + Neon
2. M + Arsenic + Copper + Lithium + Neon
3. Iron + M + Aluminum + E
4. Tungsten + Oxygen + M + A + Nitrogen
5. Germanium + Nitrogen + Thallium + E + M + A + Nitrogen
6. Lanthanum + Dysprosium 
  
Answer: Iron=Fe
Iodine=I
Nickel=Ni
Neon=Ne
Arsenic=As
Copper=Cu
Lithium=Li
Aluminum=Al
Tungsten=W
Oxygen=O
Nitrogen=N
Germanium=Ge
Thallium=Tl
Lanthanum=La
Dysprosium=Dy
 
1. Fe+M+I+Ni+Ne=feminine 
2. M+As+Cu+Li+Ne=masculine
3. Fe+M+Al+E=female
4. W+O+M+A+N=woman
5. Ge+N+Tl+E+M+A+N=gentleman
6. La+Dy=lady
 
All of the words describe females or males.  
 
Monday’s Quizzler is……….
Complete the words below using each letter of the alphabet once only:
li_ _t
_o_an
pu_ _ le
_-r_ _
e_ _l
_ _eer
_cie_ _e
g_ _ let
_u_ge
_ac_et
pu_zl_
_rai_
 
 
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Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org., http://www.hopeBUILD.org. Emoji 

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