Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Thursday, July 3, 2014.     

Stupid Criminal Stories….

Here is our collection of bungling burglars, inept robbers and dumb criminals.  One feature we noticed is that every

country seems to have it’s share of brainless lawbreakers.

 

Phone a Bungling Burglar!  Phone a burglar

A bungling burglar in the USA has been arrested after he left his mobile phone on charge at the house of one of his victims. The man was disturbed while rifling through rooms in the house in Washington DC and jumped out of a window to escape Will and Guy have learned.

 

Police searched the house later and were surprised to find a cell phone, that didn’t belong to anyone at the house, charging in a socket.

 

Officers called one of the numbers in his contacts, told them the phone owner had been involved in an accident and asked for his name. That led to the 25 year old man being arrested and later charged with ten burglaries.

 

Dutch Bungling Burglar – Loser of Month

A stupid criminal was caught after he fell down a chimney while escaping over the roof of a house he had just broken into. Police in Maastricht, Holland, arrested the 33-year-old after being called out by the house owners who heard his calls for help. The man had tried to flee out of a roof window with his booty of cash and jewelry, but tumbled in the dark and got stuck inside the chimney.

 

Another Bungled Chimney Burglar Story

A burglar who got stuck in a chimney while trying to break in to a Los Angeles home has been jailed for two years. Bungling burglar Marco Antonio Espinoza was also ordered to pay the owners of the house more than £5,000 [$9,993.20 USD] to repair the damage done when fire fighters freed him. When he was caught, he told the police that he was doing building work on the house.

 

A ‘would be’ robber had to drop his bank looting plans after he forgot to take with him a bag into which the stolen money could be put.

 

Apparently, the young man in his 20’s, entered a local Chase Bank branch early on Monday morning and passed the cashier a piece of cardboard on which was written ‘Give me your money,’ reported the Detroit News.

 

He told the bank teller to ‘hurry up,’ but when she asked him if he had a bag to put the money into he became flustered and confused and ran off without the cash.

 

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people and
whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!  Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“The World Cup has an official song. The official anthem is ‘We Will Find a Way.’ It narrowly beat out the other contender, ‘I Feel Someone’s Teeth in My Shoulder.'” –Conan O’Brien
“England was knocked out of the World Cup. It’s the most English people wiped out at one time since the last episode of ‘Game of Thrones.'” –Conan O’Brien
“During the World Cup, Uruguay is playing Italy and one of their players bites an Italian player. How many of you folks have ever been bitten by a Uruguayan?” –David Letterman
“FIFA, the world soccer governing body, says the guy who did the biting has to wear one of those dog cones for the rest of the tournament.” –David Letterman
 
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

The two criminal masterminds planned their heist carefully. They knew the courier would have a suitcase full of cash.  They waited for his car to pass, then pursued him at high speed, shooting at the vehicle until the courier was forced to pull over.Bungled Robbery – First Aid Kit.  Armed robbers made off with what they thought was a suitcase full of cash – they were in for a surprise.  Back at their secret hideout, the bandits prepared to force the locks and spring the cash.  That’s when they noticed their plan had gone horribly wrong; instead of taking the money, they made off with a first aid kit.  Police spokesman Johann Steinlitz said, ‘If there was an award for the dumbest crooks they would certainly be in the running. Bungled robbery – first aid.  But even though they did not get what they were after, we are still investigating for attempted armed robbery and endangering lives.  Luckily the courier was not harmed in the incident.’

 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 

What movie is this quote from???  ‘Moondoggie!’
  
Answer: Gidget! This is a really cute movie for all ages. You gotta love characters who call themselves, Moondoggie, Gidget, Kahoona, Lover Boy, and Stinky. This quote is said at the very end of the movie when they realize they do like each other. 
 
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 
quote from???  ‘I’m gonna…I’m gonna…I’m gonna…Go!’
 
 
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
 In this teaser you have been given two (2) clues in each line. Each answer to the clue comprises six (6) letters. Each 6-letter word differs by only one (1) letter, which I have given you. Your task is to discover the answers to the clues provided. The order of the letters do not change.
Example:
Remove _ _ _ I _ _ / _ _ _ U _ _ Justify
Answer:
E X C (I) S E / E X C (U) S E
1. Confuse R _ _ _ _ _ / C _ _ _ _ _ Bovines
2. Invent _ _ _ _ T _ / _ _ _ _ S _ Furrow
3. Endured _ A _ _ _ _ / _ I _ _ _ _ Tilted
4. Joking _ _ N _ _ _ / _ _ R _ _ _ Bargain
Answer:  1. Rattle Cattle  2. Create Crease  3. Lasted Listed  4. Banter Barter
 
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
 It’s true I bring serenity,
And hang around the stars,
But yet I live in misery,
You’ll find me behind bars.
With thieves and villains I consort,
In prison I’ll be found,
But I would never go to court,
Unless there’s more than one.
 
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Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org., http://www.hopeBUILD.org., http://www.wcscatering.com. Emoji
  
 

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