Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Monday June 2, 2014.     

 
The Top 20 Slogans for Legalized Marijuana 
 
20. Got Buzz?
19. Pot: When You Care Enough Not to Care At All.
18. A Day Without Pot is Like School.
17. Weed My Lips!
16. Hey, America – Let’s Blow This joint!
15. What’s So Great About Short-Term Memory Anyway?
14. Obey Your Jones.
13. Hemp: The world’s practical solution to making, like, paper and rope and necklaces and stuff.
12. It’s Not Just For Glaucoma Anymore!
11. Help Eradicate Road Rage in Our Lifetime.
10. Official Sponsor of the NBA.
9. Because the waste is a terrible thing to mi… Dude! I totally messed that up!
8. Cannabis: The PRE-Coital Smoke.
7. This is your brain. This is your brain on pot. This is your brain desperately searching for Doritos.
6. When Was the Last Time You REALLY Looked at Your Hand?
5. SMOKE POT! (Did we just say that out loud? Or did we just think it?)
4. Recommended by 5 Out of 5 Deadheads.
3. Just Doob It.
2. It’s the all-the-time smokey, skunky, sticky, greeny, seedy, stemmy, doobie so-you-can-get-high medicine.
and the number 1 logan for legalized marijuana… 1. Skull-Shaped Bong: $12.00 Primo Maui-Grown Bud: $25.00 Watching Teletubbies with Your Buddies: Priceless
 
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people and
whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!  Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“According to a new survey, fewer than 2 percent of hiring managers said they were actively recruiting graduates with liberal arts degrees. Said liberal arts graduates, ‘Latte for Karen.'” -Seth Meyers
“They say that when you have a baby, you lose 700 hours of sleep in the first year, but it’s worth it when they’re old enough to do the yard work.” -Craig Ferguson
“Fans of ‘The Price is Right’ got angry at President Obama yesterday because a speech he was giving interrupted the show. So let me fill them in on what they missed: Three people you don’t know got called down, and they were extremely happy about it. That’s all you missed. ” -Jimmy Fallon
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  
The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her now ex-husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about in the paper. 
 
“Honey,” his wife said, while reading the newspaper, “it looks like the government is going to cut the military forces. They are going to eliminate six over-aged destroyers.” 
 
To which the husband replies, “Sorry to hear that, dear. I’m sure you’ll miss your mother when she’s gone.”
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from???   ‘First they tore my legs off and they threw them over there. Then they took my
chest out and they threw it over there!’ 
  
Answer: The Wizard of Oz! The Scarecrow, of course, after the flying-monkey attack. 
 
TODAY’S MOVIE TRIVIA DIVIA AWARD GOES TO MS. KIM HILLYARD FOR SOLVING FRIDAY’S TRIVIA QUESTION OF THE DAY! GREAT JOB KIM! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji
 
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 
quote from??? ‘What’s that, an earthquake?’  ‘Not even a 4-pointer. Go back to sleep.’
 
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
A farmer challenges an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician to fence off the largest amount of area using the least amount of fence.
 
The engineer made his fence in a circle and said it was the most efficient.
 
The physicist made a long line and said that the length was infinite. Then he said that fencing half of the Earth was the best.
 
The mathematician laughed at the others and with his design, beat the others. What did he do?  
 
Answer:  The mathematician made a small fence around himself and declared himself to be on the outside.
 
Monday’s Quizzler is……….
Based on the clue in parentheses, find a four-letter word that can be inserted backwards into the blank to complete a longer word.
 
Example: di____ve (a defeat)
Answer: dissolve (“A defeat” gives you LOSS, which is placed backwards in the blank: di_SSOL_ve.)
 
1. s____ing (earth)
2. si____lk (felt reverent)
3. cam____e (chauffeur driven car)
4. s____way (bass; extreme)
 
 
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS. SUPER SOLVING JOB BANKS! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji
EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org., http://www.hopeBUILD.org., http://www.wcscatering.com. Emoji
 

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