Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

08ae7fb498d5d83447b124c0bf40ae38

WELCOME to Thursday April 3, 2014.  

  
The Exploding Toilet
A MAN was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his engine on the motorcycle and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear. The man, still holding the handlebars, was dragged through a glass patio door and along with the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house. The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found her husband laying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle laying next to him and the patio door shattered. The wife ran to the phone and summoned an ambulance. Because they lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps to the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
 
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the hospital, the wife uprighted the motorcycle and pushed it outside. Seeing that gas had spilled on the floor, the wife obtained some papers towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet. The husband was treated at the hospital and was released to come home.
 
After arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent, went into the bathroom, sat on the toilet and smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, he flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while still seated. The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her husband laying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering burns on the buttocks, the back of his legs and his groin. The wife again ran to the phone and called for an ambulance.
 
The same ambulance crew was dispatched and the wife met them at the street. The paramedics loaded the husband on the stretcher and began carrying him to the street. While they were going down the stairs to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked the wife how the husband had burned himself. She told them and the paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them tipped the stretcher and dumped the husband out. He fell down the remaining steps and broke his arm. Now THAT is a bad day…
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to paint it.”
–Steven Wright
“Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.”
–Mahatma Gandhi
“Lasting change is a series of compromises. And compromise is all right, as long your values don’t change.”
–Jane Goodall
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.
So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.
I feel better already
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer? 
What movie is this quote from??? 
Ned: ‘What is this thing?’
Bill: ‘That’s the blessed Virgin, Ned.’
Ned: ‘She’s pretty, huh?’
Bill: ‘Not only is she pretty, but she’s got a nice personality, and she’s the mother of God.’
  
Answer:  ‘Simple Men’ Directed by Hal Hartley, it was a PBS American Playhouse coproduction.
Hal Hartley often casts the same actors, such as Bill Sage, Martin Donovan, and Parker Posey.
 
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this 
quote from???  ‘One day I heard the sound of a woman singing. She must not have understood that someone might hear her. I thought of mermaids…’
 
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
Starting with a one-letter word or abbreviation, add a letter and rearrange the letters to produce the next. A clue is given for each.
Maybe your car does 0 to 60 in 10 sec., but can you do this “0 to 10” in 60 sec.? Go on – get out the stopwatch!
 
The hint provides the starting letters of the even numbered words.
1. Ford model, known as “Tin Lizzie”
2. @
3. Traitor (slang)
4. Not before the horse, please!
5. Track down; discover
6. Collected by bees
7. Convinced, beyond any doubt
8. Completed in 6 days, according to Genesis
9. “Ashes to ashes”
10. Power and authority; significance 
 
ANSWER:  1. T
2. At
3. Rat
4. Cart
5. Trace
6. Nectar
7. Certain
8. Creation
9. Cremation
10. Importance
 
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
Though my beauty is becoming, I can hurt you just the same.
I come in many colors.
You will always know my name.
Some love me for one reason.
Some may dislike me just as well.
More than one of any color of me will surely always sel
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS FOR A SUPER SOLVING JOB ON TUESDAY! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji  
 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. http://www.Eucman.freedom10.com,  EmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s