Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday January 28, 2014.  

True Story…….
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.
“Careful . CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD!
WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK!
Careful … CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when
you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY?
Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you
always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!”
The wife stared at him. “What’s wrong with you? You think I don’t know
how to fry a couple of eggs?”
The husband calmly replied, “I wanted to show you what it feels like when
I’m driving”. Emoji
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people and whatever you do,
don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
 
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“Justin Bieber was arrested in Miami Beach on a DUI. He was also busted for resisting arrest and drag racing. Justin was clocked going 60 miles an hour in a Lamborghini. Wow, 60 miles an hour in a Lamborghini? Hey Justin, it’s called second gear. Try it sometime.” -Jay Leno
“On the new season of ‘Sesame Street,’ Cookie Monster will do a segment where he urges kids to eat healthy. The segment ends with Cookie Monster looking off-camera and asking, ‘Now you let Cookie Monster’s wife and kids go?'” -Conan O’Brien
“The next season of ‘Survivor’ will have contestants divided into groups based on how strong, smart, and pretty they are. It’ll take place at this exotic location known as high school.” -Jimmy Fallon
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  
 I was recovering from surgery when a charity representative phoned asking me to take part in a door-to-door fund-raising effort. “Sorry,” I replied, “but I’ve been incapacitated.”
Undaunted, the caller kept trying to convince me to change my mind and volunteer.
I interrupted and said, “I’m incapacitated. Do you know what that means?”
She hesitated. “It means your head was cut off?”
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from???  ‘Dogs barking. Can’t fly without umbrella.’
 
Answer: Jumpin’ Jack Flash! This is the critical, encrypted message sent by super-spy Jack (Johnathan Pryce) to bank teller Terry (Whoopi Goldberg) via their computer-enabled communications arrangement. 
 
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???   ‘Do you know how stupid he is? He thinks that the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.’
 
 
Monday’s Quizzler is……….
Fill in the grid below with valid words using the letters: AAEEIIMMPPTT. The grid, when completed, reads the same across as down.
 
L _ _ _
_ D _ _
_ _ A _
_ _ _ E 
 
ANSWER: The words are limp, idea, meat, and pate.
 
L I M P
I D E A
M E A T
P A T E  
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
The sphinx wanted to know which one of the three gods stole the golden apple. Was it Horus, Anubis or Osiris?
 
”I didn’t,” said Horus.
”Osiris did,” said Anubis.
”Anubis is lying,” said Osiris
 
The sphinx knew that one god was telling the truth and the other two were lying.
 
Who stole the golden apple?
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO OUR RESIDENT GENIUS, MS. ANDREA L. BANKS ONCE AGAIN!  SUPER SOLVING JOB BANKS! EmojiEmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. http://www.Eucman.freedom10.com,  EmojiEmojiEmojiEmoji 
 

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