Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏‏

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WELCOME to Tuesday September 3, 2013. Laughing will increase your life span...

1) Long back, a person who sacrificed his sleep, forgot his family, forgot his food, Forgot laughter were called “Saints”, But now they are called.. “IT professionals”
2) An interesting line written at the back of a Biker’s T Shirt : “If you are able to see this, please tell me that my girlfriend has fallen off”
3) Most Relationships fail not because of the absence of love..
Love is always present.. Its just that,
One loves too much, And the other loves too many,
4) Employee: Boss, Now I have got married..! Please increase my salary..!
BOSS: Factory is not responsible for accidents occurring outside the company..!
5) Philosophy of life
At the beginning of married life, every gal treats her husband as GOD,
Later on somehow the alphabets got reversed..!
6) What is a Fear?
Fear is the Deep, Wrenching feeling in your stomach
When pages of your book still smell new and Just few hours left for your exams..!
7) Useful
Someone has rightly said, “A fool can ask More questions that a wise man cannot answer”
No Wonder why so many of us speechless when lecturers ask question..!
8) Girl: Do you have Cards with sentimental Love quotes?
Shopkeeper: Oh sure..@! How about this card, it says “To the only boy I ever loved.!”
Girl: That’s good, Give me 12 of them..!
9) After reading the form filled by an applicant.. The employer said: ” WE do have an… opening for you..! “
Applicant: What is it?
Interviewer: Its called the “door..!”
10) A Banner Sign Board In front of an IT company..
Drive Slowly, Don’t kill our Employee….. Leave them to us.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Tuesday people, and whatever you do today, don’t
forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
 
QUOTES OF THE DAY   
“The owner of an ice cream truck named Snow Cone Joe was arrested for allegedly stalking his rival truck, called Mr. Ding-a-Ling. It’s being called the saddest turf war ever.” -Conan O’Brien
“A company in California has started selling a new cologne that smells like whiskey. I think my dad’s been wearing that cologne for 40 years.” -Jimmy Fallon
“A company called Dog Nation just launched an IQ online test for your dog. It covers understanding hand gestures and learning words. It’s actually a secret IQ test for humans. If you pay $60 to give your dog an IQ test, you failed.” -Jimmy Kimmel
 
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  
The problem – There’s a box with a hole at each end and there’s a rabbit in the box. The rabbit sticks his head out of the hole in one end, and a minute later he sticks it out the other end.
Half a minute later, his head appears at the opposite end, a fourth of a minute later it appears at the end opposite to that one, an eighth of a minute later… etc., etc.
How long will it take before the rabbit sticks its head out of both ends of the box at the same time?
In theory, two minutes. In practice, no answer is possible unless, of course, you split hares.
 
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “Dr. Ryan, I’m a politician which means I’m a liar and a cheat. If I’m not kissing babies, I’m stealing their lollipops.
 
Answer:  “The Hunt for Red October” is set in the middle of the cold war between the USSR and the US. A senior and well respected Russian Sub commander, Marco Ramius, and his handpicked crew use a state of the art nuclear submarine that runs nearly undetectable by modern sonar to defect to the United States. This plot is unknown to US officials who are unsure of this rouge submarine’s intentions and must decide whether or not to seek and destroy Red October or to assist her attempt to evade her Soviet pursuers to safe harbor in America. After arguing a theory that the Red October’s crew’s intent is indeed to defect and not to attack to a group of high level military officers and security officials, CIA analyst Jack Ryan is reluctantly sent on a mission to prove his theory correct. This mission will bring him right to the front of the cold war and will put his life in the hands of the very men he believes to be defectors.
 
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??? “Most people believe the twentieth century was defined by the death struggle of communism versus capitalism, and that fascism was but a hiccup. Today we know better. Communism was a fool’s errand, the followers of Marx gone from this Earth; but the followers of Hitler abound and thrive”
 
 
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
We are two different things
We can both be ridden
One runs on black ground
The other runs on green
We both drink liquids
And we have the same name
What are we? 
ANSWER: We are mustangs. Horse and car.
Horse – ridden on, runs on green grass, drinks water
Car – ridden in, runs on black roads, drinks gas
Both have the same name
Tuesday’s Quizzler is………. 
What phrase is this?
Monk A) I am his mother’s cousin.
Monk B) I am his father’s nephew
Monk C) I am his mother’s father
Monk D) I am his brother’s friend
Monk E) I shall become his father’s brother
 
 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.   https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/ LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com. http://www.Eucman.freedom10.com,  
  
 

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