WELCOME to Wednesday May 29, 2013. New Courses for Women
Training courses now available for women on the following subjects:
Topic 1 – Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone
Topic 2 – The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
Topic 3 – Parties: Going Without New Outfits
Topic 4 – Bathroom Etiquette: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too
Topic 5 – Common Skills : Tears – The Last Resort, not the First
Topic 6 – Common Skills II: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
First please don’t shoot the messenger, second that’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday people, and whatever you do today, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
QUOTES OF THE DAY
A Zen master once said to me, “Do the opposite of whatever I tell you.” So I didn’t.
“My doctor tells me I suffer from extreme hypochondria. He prescribed a strong placebo, but I don’t think it’s working.” -Fred Marcum
“The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.” –Unknown
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
I telephoned the veterinarian’s office to ask when I should take my three month old kitten in to be vaccinated for rabies. After a few initial questions, the woman who answered the telephone asked, “What is the kitten’s name?”
“Demon”, I replied.
“Demon? That’s an odd name,” she said.
“Maybe, but it’s appropriate anyway.”
I heard clicking of a computer keyboard, then she said, “Our records show that you have cats named Gato [which is Spanish for ‘male cat’], Scamp, Stinky, and now you named one Demon. Is that right?”
“Yes, it is.” “You really don’t like cats, do you?”
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?
What movie is this quote from??? “That punk pulled a Glock 7 on me. You know what that is? It’s a porcelain gun made in Germany. Doesn’t show up on your airport X-ray machines, here, and it cost more than you make in a month.”
Answer: Die Hard 2 (Die Harder) This quote by McClane (Bruce Willis) is directed at Captain Lorenzo (Dennis Franz) in the scene immediately after he has killed a terrorist in the baggage area of the airport.
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from??? “I’m talking about the gas chamber, and you haven’t even asked me what this is about. You’ve got a big “Guilty” sign around your neck.”
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
At a train station in Sydney, Australia, an intelligent rich man was awaiting his upper class rail transport. He was sorting through his wallet and pulled out credit cards, receipts, and $200 in cash.
An egotistical scam artist (and a talented one at that) approached the man and said to him, “I’ll bet you, on all the money in your wallet, that I can get a packet of chips out of that snack machine without inserting any money!”
The rich man, who was intrigued by this ‘talent’, readily agreed.
The scam artist walked over to the snack dispenser, stuck his hand up through the compartments, and a chip packet fell out.
The rich man was amazed, but being a faithful businessman, stuck to his word, yet the scam artist walked off without a penny.
ANSWER: The rich man had already removed all the money and items from his wallet before he made the bet. Therefore, when he gave the scammer all the money in his wallet, it totaled $0!
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
Here is a group of common three-letter words. Can you take these and turn them into half as many 6 letter words? Each three-letter word is used only once.
bar, bit, box, boy, car, day, den, dim, fly, hid, low, now, nut, pan, pea, sun, ten, try, win, wit