Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏

Welcome, to Thursday, December 31th! Hey it’s New Year’s Eve! How about a look at ten things a Cat thinks about?

1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.

2. Is there something I’m not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?

3. Why doesn’t the government do something about dogs?

4. I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ULTERIOR motives?

5. Hmmm… If dogs serve humans, and humans serve cats, why can’t we cats ever get these STUPID dogs to do anything for us?

6. This looks like a good spot for a nap.

7. Hey — no kidding, I’m sure that’s the can opener.

8. Would humans have built a vast and complex civilization of their own if we cats hadn’t given them a reason to invent sofas and can openers in the first place?

9. If there’s a God, how can He allow neutering?

10. If that really was the can opener, I’ll play finicky just to let THEM know who’s boss!

“That’s my story for today and I’m sticking to it! Have a great day people, I’ll see you NEXT YEAR! Also whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

Quotes of the Day

“There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.” – Oscar Levant

“Fig Newton: The force required to accelerate a fig 39.37 inches per sec.” – J. Hart

“My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping.” – Rita Rudner

A friend had a waitressing position open at his diner and asked job seekers to fill out an application. Under “Salary Expected,” a woman wrote “Friday.”

The highlight of our zoo trip was a peacock showing off its plumage. My four-year-old son was particularly taken with it. That evening, he couldn’t wait to tell his father: “Dad, guess what! I saw a Christmas tree come out of a chicken!”

Driving in Ohio, we spotted a sign that read, “Wildlife Refuge.” Seeing a dead deer lying in front of it, my husband shook his head. “He almost made it.”

Joke of the Day*

A couple went to pay a visit to another couple, unannounced. The wife answered the door. “Come in,” she said. The other couple came in, sat down, then asked, “So, where’s Jack?” “Oh,” replied his wife, “he’s in the bathroom, grouting and spackling.” “Oh, dear,” said the other lady, “I had that once and didn’t get over it for two weeks.”

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘Good, bad, I’m the one with the gun.’ Answer: Army of Darkness.

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???? ‘You keep on using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.’

Wednesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. This song is one of the biggest hits for The Eagles, and the next song was a hit in the late 1960’s for The Mamas and the Papas.    Answer: Hotel California Dreaming. The Eagles’ album “Hotel California” was released in December of 1976, and went platinum in only one week! It was number one on the charts within a month. The Mamas and the Papas were formed in 1964, and had a hit with “California Dreaming” in 1966. However, the group’s success was short-lived, and they broke up in 1968 due to creative differences.

Thursday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. What would you get if you combined a song from “The Muppet Movie” with one from “The Wizard of Oz”?
 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is..
A song title has been put into very fancy language. Put it back into its original form.

These individuals are totally unacquainted with each other at the time of day that is usually considered late p.m. to early a.m.
ANSWER: “Strangers in the Night.”

Thursday’s Quizzler is…
In this teaser, I have given you a 9-letter word. Your job is to break up this word into 9 separate letters and place them on the dashes to spell a 7-letter word, a 5-letter word, and a 3-letter word. You can use each letter only once.

TEMPORARY

_ N _ M _ R _

_ O _ O _

_ I _

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTERS OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO SWEETJAZZ5!  WAY2GO JAZZZZ!
Answers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.

MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. ww.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.Eucmaninc.com. http://www.wcscatering.com., http://www.Beaumont77.com. http://www.BTWASHZPROD.com. http://www.newnorthsideconferencecenter.net. http://www.greengrassgroundsgroup.com., http://www.schoons.com., http://www.awj-law.com.

Are you open to evaluate an opportunity to make some extra money?  http://strayhorn.acnrep.com.

Euclid C. Strayhorn, CMP, http://www.EucmanInc.com
We don’t stop laughing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop LAUGHING!

Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏

Welcome, to Wednesday, December 30th!  Has everyone recovered from their holiday festivities? Take a breather while you have the chance because it’s not over yet. The big one is this Thursday…New Year’s Eve. My wife plans are either church or the St. Louis Street festival thing, I just can’t remember the name first night or something. One thing for sure is that one will totally put me to sleep while the other one will freeze my assets off. What a way to end the year and start the new one.  “That’s my story for today and I’m sticking to it! Have a great day people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!   
  
Quotes of the Day 


“The great tragedy of Science – the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact.”
– Thomas H. Huxley

“The conventional view serves to protect us from the painful job of thinking.”
– John Kenneth Galbraith

“Personally I’m always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.”
– Sir Winston Churchill 

“A new study shows that California has the dirtiest tap water in the country. California officials insist that the dirty water is fine as long as you chew it thoroughly.” -Conan O’Brien
 
“They used to say a recession is when your neighbor lost his job, and a depression is when you lost yours, but now they say a recession is when Wall Street gets bailed out, and a depression is what you get thinking about it.” -Jay Leno
 
“A new study found that women’s faces age and wrinkle just like their mothers. The study was conducted by the American Society of Wrong Things to Say to Your Wife.” -Jimmy Fallon 

Joke of the Day! 
A man goes into a restaurant, sits down at a table and an attractive young waitress comes for his order. He gives her a smile and says, “I want a quickie.” She turns red in the face and ahems, “Sir, I don’t know what kind of restaurant you’re used to eating in, but I can assure you you’re not going to get a quickie here!” “How disappointing,” the man replied. “Could you ask the chef to make an exception?” “He doesn’t have anything to do with it!” says the waitress indignantly.  “Hmmm,” do you know anywhere around here where I could get a quickie?” “I’m SURE I don’t know,” answers the waitress loudly. A patron from the next table leans over and taps the man on the shoulder, “I think it’s pronounced QUICHE.”    
 
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘Dead or alive, you are coming with me.’ Answer: Robocop. Great action film from the 80s.   
 
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? ‘Good, bad, I’m the one with the gun.’

 
Tuesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. James Brown sang about how he felt, while the Beach Boys sang of feeling a little bit “shaky”.  Answer: I Feel Good VibrationsJames Brown, a.k.a. “The Godfather of Soul”, was inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in 1986. His hit “I Feel Good” was a chart-topper in 1966. (Note: the actual title is (“I Got You) I Feel Good” but most people know this song as simply “I Feel Good”). The Beach Boys’ #1 Hit from 1966, “Good Vibrations”, came from the album “Pet Sounds”.  
 
Wednesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. This song is one of the biggest hits for The Eagles, and the next song was a hit in the late 1960’s for The Mamas and the Papas. 
 
TODAY’S CRAZYDEFINTIONS MASTERS OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. KIM HILLYARD AND SWEETJAZZ5! GREAT JOB KIM AND JAZZZZZZZ! 
 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is..  

The name GEORGe mIchAel has the state GEORGIA hidden inside it, in order from left to right. Can you find the states hidden in each of the following?
1. MUSTACHE
2. MAX STEINER
3. GEORGE HARRISON
4. THAT’S THE WAY IT IS
5. INTERDENOMINATIONAL
6. JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME
7. JUMP ON THE BANDWAGON

 

 

ANSWER: 1. Utah, 2. Maine, 3. Ohio, 4. Hawaii, 5. Indiana, 6. Nevada, 7. Montana
 
Wednesday’s Quizzler is…

A song title has been put into very fancy language. Put it back into its original form.

These individuals are totally unacquainted with each other at the time of day that is usually considered late p.m. to early a.m.

 

TODAY’S QUIZZMASTERS OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. CARRIE PALOMBO, MS. KIM HILLYARD AND SWEETJAZZ5! WAY2GO LADIES!
 

Answers in THURSDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com 

MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT:  www.slampi.orgww.hopeBUILD.orgwww.Eucmaninc.com. www.wcscatering.com., www.Beaumont77.com. www.BTWASHZPROD.com.   www.newnorthsideconferencecenter.netwww.greengrassgroundsgroup.com., www.schoons.com., www.awj-law.com.   

 Are you open to evaluate an opportunity to make some extra money?  http://strayhorn.acnrep.com

Euclid C. Strayhorn, CMP
We don’t stop laughing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop LAUGHING!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!‏

Welcome, to Tuesday, December 29th! ALL I NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED FROM A SNOWMAN….1. It’s okay if you’re a little bottom heavy. 2. Hold your ground, even when the heat is on. 3. Wearing white is always appropriate. 4. Winter is the best of the four seasons. 5. It takes a few extra rolls to make a good midsection. 5. There’s nothing better than a foul weather friend. 6. We’re all made up of mostly water. 7. You know you’ve made it when they write a song about you. 8. Accessorize! Accessorize! Accessorize! 9. Avoid yellow snow. Don’t get too much sun. 10. It’s embarrassing when you can’t look down and see your feet. 11. It’s fun to hang out in your front yard. 12. There’s no stopping you once you’re on a roll. And in the grand tradion of saving the best for last…13. It’s not the size of the carrot, but the placement that counts. “That’s my story for today and I’m sticking to it! Have a great day people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

Quotes of the Day

“Acting is the most minor of gifts and not a very high class way to earn a living. After all, Shirley Temple could do it at the age of four.” – Katharine Hepburn

“Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but backwards and in high heels.”
– Bob Thaves

“Sure I’m for helping the elderly. I’m going to be old myself some day.”
– Lillian Carter, in her 80s

“President Obama says that this year for Christmas his daughters want an iPod, video games and some books. But boy — you should have seen the looks on their faces when he told them instead they’re both getting universal healthcare.” -Conan O’Brien

“President Obama said on a radio show this morning that he and Michelle decided several years ago not to exchange Christmas presents. My wife and I made the same decision a few years ago and let me tell you, it’s a trap, Obama! Don’t fall for it.” -Jimmy Fallon

“In Massachusetts, Republicans are upset over a new tax hike on dogs. It was slipped into a bill at the last minute by Democrats. Democrats claim they’re only going to be taxing dogs that make over $250,000 a year, though.” -Jay Leno

Joke of the Day*
A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday. The following week she asked each child in turn what they had learned. Susie said, “He was born in a manger.” Bobby said, “He threw the money changers out of the temple.” Little Johnny said, “He has a red pickup truck but he doesn’t know how to drive it.” Curious, the teacher asked, “And where did you learn that, Johnny?” “From my Daddy,” said Johnny. “Yesterday we were driving down the highway, and this red pickup truck pulled out in front of us and Daddy yelled at him, ‘Jesus Christ! Why don’t you learn how to drive?'”

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘You know, it really stinks down here. How often do some of your people take a bath?’ Answer: Midway. Starring Charlton Heston.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???? ‘Dead or alive, you are coming with me.’
 

Monday’s Crazy definitions, I will give you lyrics from each song, in order. You provide the Before and After answer. Each answer may involve two or three songs. Earth below us, drifting, falling.
The world is, the world is, love and life are deep. Answer: Major Tom Sawyer. “Major Tom,” by Peter Schilling, continues the story of Major Tom begun in David Bowie’s “Space Oddity.” “Tom Sawyer” is by Rush.

Tuesday’s Crazy definitions, This quiz features the names of various song titles that share a word in common and are written back-to-back. James Brown sang about how he felt, while the Beach Boys sang of feeling a little bit “shaky”.

Monday’s Quizzler is..
Your task is to discover what the following words have in common with each other. Good luck:
Comanche
Hesperus
Minimalist
Nebuchadnezzar
Piranha
ANSWER: Each word has a country hidden within.
cOMANche, hesPERUs, miniMALIst, nebuCHADnezzar, pIRANha

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…
The name GEORGe mIchAel has the state GEORGIA hidden inside it, in order from left to right. Can you find the states hidden in each of the following?

1. MUSTACHE
2. MAX STEINER
3. GEORGE HARRISON
4. THAT’S THE WAY IT IS
5. INTERDENOMINATIONAL
6. JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME
7. JUMP ON THE BANDWAGON
Answers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.

MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. ww.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.Eucmaninc.com. http://www.wcscatering.com., http://www.Beaumont77.com. http://www.BTWASHZPROD.com. http://www.newnorthsideconferencecenter.net. http://www.greengrassgroundsgroup.com., http://www.schoons.com., www.awj-law.com

Are you open to evaluate an opportunity to make some extra money?  http://strayhorn.acnrep.com.